The Hefty Lefty is unemployed

Jared Lorenzen, the mammoth backup Quarterback of the New York Giants, has been released. The move brings about the end of a sterling career, in which Jared's main (non-eating) achievement was that classic first-down two seasons ago awhen he was brought out on 3rd and 1 instead of Eli Manning against the Eagles. Of course, there's very little way of stopping Jared getting a yard, providing he doesn't collapse under his own weight before the snap.

Like a human bowling ball, 285lb (yeah, right) Lorenzen is affectionately known by about 562 nicknames, but of course, 'The Pilsbury Throwboy' must get an honourable mention.

Despite our mockery, Lorenzen should really catch on somewhere. He's a role model for people everywhere, someone who literally doesn't care at all about their weight and yet still played QB in the NFL, despite being bigger than most of his linemen.